After an extended Christmas break, I am back in the office today. And by “the office,” I mean my actual office — my desk, my computer, my phone… No more MacGyver reporting, with a laptop that only connects with the router if I’m sitting on top of it or a cell phone pinched between my ear and shoulder, giving me neck spasms when I’m lucky enough to have decent reception.
My office: It’s messy and cramped but it’s all mine.
No, today I have my big fat wide computer screen again. I have my Outlook up and running again, so hopefully no more missed emails. I have my phone headset and can start recording interviews again. Ah… a prepared office! If only it made for a prepared mind.
It’s crazy difficult to focus on generating story ideas and doing the freelance shuffle when my mind is consumed with questions about our insurance settlement, what color to paint the walls and how to get the backsplash tiles I really want without paying millionaire’s prices for them. Just like when my kids were born, and all I wanted to focus on was them, so I am now with this house. Can’t we bond a bit more before I have to focus on deadlines? Can’t she be just a bit further along in the world, such as have the walls all painted and the floors installed? Can’t I get that sense that “she’s ready” before I turn my back, if just for a few hours a day?
Nope, because mama’s got to bring home the bacon (even if i don’t have a pan to fry it up in). The first quarter is historically for me a slow time of the year. That’s not good, since I really need to make as much money as possible right now to fund the extras we’d like to do, such as some really beautiful lighting fixtures, and the necessities not covered by insurance, such as our barbecue grill, TV and entertainment system and all those lost shoes.
So it’s “go” time. I need to find my mojo, ignore the sounds of drilling and sanding and hammering and focus on my business. One good way to do that would be to end this now. And so ciao for now, my damaged, needy home. Mommy needs to work.
